Sirius Black

All right, there?

Justin, what's this about your potion catching fire? Is this to do with whatever happened last night?

If it's private or personal, I've no wish to pry but if there's anything we ought to know...well, I do hope you'll tell me.

You know we're all rather captive here without any idea what's going on. In the absence of hard facts, there's only speculation to be had. You should know that Sally-Anne's told Remus nothing apart from this training accident story, but.... Look here, are you two in some sort of trouble? Were you caught together, or something?

If you're afraid we'll be cross with you, I assure you, I'll do all I can to help.

How's that student - Montgomery?

And have there been any aftereffects from the memory modifications on her companions?

I'm posting privately mainly not to worry certain types who, er, don't necessarily know what happened yesterday afternoon. Though eventually Alice and Charlie need to be told - I thought there was no sense worrying Molly everyone else, particularly with Hagrid's involvement in saving that girl.

That's it.

I know it's important to maintain the illusion that most of the ISS are dutiful, diligent and devoted denizens of the Protectorate and Hogwarts but honestly, how much longer are we going to let them endure that woman's nonsense?

Molly, I know we said they had to stay for their NEWTs but if Fred and George feel they need to take a stand by leaving, I say you should let them. (Fred, George, take note!) As for the others - pull them all out, I say. We had them at Grimmauld this past fortnight and it was perfectly successful. Emrys, it was better in that we were able to combine with a few of the Moddey kids as well. More like it ought to be.

I know, the halfbloods have to make it through their OWLs - but let's face it, the way things are going, that's not going to do them any bloody good except maybe keeping them out of the camps. And if they joined the Order and lived here at Grimmauld, they wouldn't even need to fear being sent there, anyway. For sure we ought to leave it up to them if they stay once they've taken their O.W.L.s and there's nothing holding them to their lessons.

Every day we leave them in the hands of that malevolent whale they are in danger. Danger that is probably just as bad as anything Carrow ever did, maybe worse in some ways. And we tolerated that all that time because there wasn't an alternative while so many of them were so young. But we don't have to tolerate it now. She can't even claim the same protections as a Death Eater, for Circe's sake. And we're leaving our best hopes of success to have to turn to the likes of Antonin motherfucking DOLOHOV for their own safety and any shred of education they might be salvaging from this waste of a year.

Pull them out, I say. Or we join up with Albus and Sniv Snape there at school and put a stop to her ourselves.

Are either of you reading?

Remus, have you got today's paper? Check the Court report, will you, and see if there's anything about who's meant to be taking on the Dark Arts teaching job?

If it's who Arthur and I think, we might want to advise the Jr Auxiliary to keep their wits about them this term.

Ellie's asleep so I can risk changing back for a few hours.

Poppy: I've been thinking about your report on Barty Crouch, Sr. What in Merlin's name was he doing at Hogwarts? Has anyone figured that out?

And Kingsley, Molly: I don't think I've any good advice for you. You seem to be doing well enough with them. Keep at it, I suppose, until he can decide what's best for him and the boy.

I thought I'd let everyone know: I watched Ellie read my Grim Truth today. She waited until Remus was in the front of the shop and Dora was upstairs. She was in the kitchen to put together tea and as she was waiting for the kettle, she took a long, guilty look out at the shop, to make sure Remus wasn't going to come back soon. She pulled out her journal and flipped to my pages.

I know it was mine, in fact, because she pointed it out to Sinbad. 'Don't tell,' she said, 'No one's supposed to read his. He's meant to be bad. But he's not.'

She reads quite slowly and occasionally I could see her lips move. I think she had to re-read some of the sentences to make sense of them. (Perhaps I ought to think about writing to a lower comprehension level.) But something I wrote made her blink away tears. I didn't think it was that awful, personally.

She stopped herself crying, though, and put the journal away and fussed about with the tea. 'Honour the lost,' she said under her breath, 'by fulfilling a better purpose.' Then she patted Sinbad on the head. 'Right now my better purpose is Mr Ponds' tea, innit?' and that's when she put the tray together for you, Moony.

I wonder if she knew someone in the camps who'd been part of DogStar.

Right, I'm just putting this here because I dunno where else to put it. And I'm too knackered to look anywhere else

Rejected Rationales (by Mssrs Moony and Padfoot):

• The truth (we wanted to give Alecto more of what Frank and I gave her brother to get the castle's secret out of her)
• We were running low on Wolfsbane and thought we'd get more direct from Snivellus
• We just started to head north ....
• We ran out of Firewhiskey and decided to raid Minerva's cupboard
• Hagrid reported something dangerous in Hogwarts
• Hagrid heard that a copy of Harry's prophecy was hidden in the Divination classroom
• We came to beg Pomona's forgiveness (despite doing nothing wrong)
• We got tired and thought to kip in Gryffindor Tower
• We brought Bea (and ourselves) for Poppy's checkup
• We thought we'd get her pre-Sorted
• We wanted to have a good look at the book (since Minerva's been so behind on it) - I still do like that one
• 'No one expects the Spanish Inquisition!'
• We wanted to snoop through the Astronomy professor's office
• We were arranging a welcome back for Hermione

Am I forgetting any? We still don't have a good one, but like you said, virtually any excuse is going to go over better than the truth.

I'm -- 

That last Apparation was

Well. It was worth it but I don't think we ought to do anything else like that again soon, yeah?

Better pick up some buns for breakfast. For you two, anyway. I'll stick to the ginger tea stuff.

Well, for those of you who've been wondering about Harry, he's sent me an owl. (Hermione, did you have anything to do with that? Or did he decide to do it on his own? Just wondering.)

He sounds fairly depressed about being chosen, in point of fact. He swears that he didn't put his own name in - says Draco Malfoy of all people suggested that he write down another student's name instead of his own - but he thinks the whole thing might have been rigged from the start to make sure he could be named Champion. Says he thinks the other lad, Diggory, is a much better choice.

He says he's not too keen to look naff in front of three schools, up against competitors who are two or three years ahead of him. He doesn't say it right out but I think he's worried about failing at the tasks and getting himself hurt. Either way, sounds like he's planning to lose and rather badly at that. I'd be depressed too, with those prospects.

And yes, Moony, he's telling me point-blank he doesn't need me to come running up there and putting myself at risk. Just wanted to talk to someone, I think. Someone who can advise but who isn't going to scold him or tell Voldemort.

That's another thing. I've never quite heard or seen him so vocally opposed to Voldemort before. Hermione, is that ... I mean to say, have you and he been talking a lot more lately? About things? Does he say this kind of stuff in front of anyone who might betray him? What's Malfoy's part in all this?

I don't want the rest of you thinking that he's suddenly off to join the revolution. But he goes on about how Voldemort tends to push him right in the spotlight when that's the last thing he wants. And how the bastard's changed (which we've all heard before, Minerva's reported that much) - but here's the thing, Harry seems to perceive a shift of sorts in Voldemort's attitude toward him, as well as all the physical differences. Harry calls it being less interested in him, not listening. Sounds to me like he's simply stopped feigning whatever interest he pretended to have in the first place. That is, if there's anything to it besides the usual teenage angst!

Anyway. Unless Minerva can give us that blow-by-blow of the discussion Monday night, and what she may or may not know about who really did put his name in, I continue to think that whomever did it does not wish him any cash prize or the glory of Hogwarts. But now that he's in it, I think we'd best help him however we can, if only so the poor kid doesn't get handed his own wand-arm in a sling.

For the time being.

Kingsley, you got my Patronus. Sorry, that's all I had time to manage last night.

Time, ha. Funny.

I left Moony back at Tilda's, once he was able to transform. Dora I'm afraid he won't be any use to you with Bea, but he's okay. Truly - he was even lucid enough to take a few steps over the threshold. I thnk that potion had an effect even though he missed the final dose.

And about that: I'm sorry. Well, I'm sorry we frigtened everyone. It was ....

I'm still trying to piece it all together. I think the Snape and Macnair that Remus and I spotted must have been the second ones. Is that right, Hermione? That's why they were in the Shack when we fell back there and why they didn't know anything about keeping Buckbeak from mauling you lot.

I can explain more to Frank and Kingsley this morning. Snape claims he wants to join us. I didn't believe him - still not sure but he insisted on the Unbreakable Vow. Macnair too. I mean to say, Macnair swore it too. And me. I don't necessarily trust them to help Harry when they can but then, I don't much care if they die breaking their promise to him, either. Meanwhile we were just getting to explanations when we heard the alarm had gone up and MLE were heading for the Shack. So we ran for it.

Dora, Poppy, you must believe that Remus and I thought we had time to get Harry and Hermione away from Snape when we went out there. Neither of us expected it to get this complicated. He changed as we left the tunnel; Hermione tripped and then she realised Miss Parkinson was also on the grounds, trapped up a tree. Snape and Macnair scattered and Harry ran with him. And the Malfoy boy woke and ran and - I'm not quite sure how, but Alecto Carrow came upon us. I had to change to duel her.

Then Harry came back - he's going to be an ace duellist - and I told him and Pansy and Hermione to run to the castle fast as they could. Only then Harry gave me the time-turner. Hermione, I'm getting it out of order again, Morgana, this is confusing. Help me out where I've got it wrong.

What I do remember is that Harry told me that I had to take Buckbeak and get Snape and Macnair out of the tower after they were taken there - and then give the time-turner to Snape so that he and Macnair could rescue Buckbeak and save Harry from getting mauled. Understand? I couldn't argue it - I mean to say, they already had done, which means I must have done. I found the creature nearly mad from all the Dementors near the lake, although just as I arrived I saw the glow of a patronus somewere nearby. I got them out and had to let Buckbeak go so I could find Moony.

That's why I proposed the rendez-vous. Frank, yes, please come along. I just don't trust them - swearing to protect and help Harry (and not to harm him) doesn't mean they won't have any scruples about anyone else.

Allie, I saw your note of yesterday. Time to let you two in on a little secret: I've become a tutor again. At this rate I shall be as qualified as anyone at Moddey at teaching muggleborns.

You've no idea how the proximity of the Dementors is affecting everyone up the castle - for myself, I find I'm in no mood to have an argument with Poppy or Minerva or any of them, so except for Pomona I'm simply steering clear.

Well, that's ... problematic when the N.E.W.T. exams are ongoing (And O.W.L.s next week, as we've just been reminded). I had to break cover and get myself up to that extra-large storage cupboard up on the 6th floor (Moony, you know the one we used to lock up the Slytherin team's brooms that year they were being absolutely murderous about the Final?). I made it inside no problem - as Padfoot, just in case. I mean to say, not that a large dog wouldn't raise just as much alarm, if he were seen, but at least it wouldn't be another sighting of Sirius Black's ghost, eh?

As I say, I made it to the cupboard but I wanted to put a locking charm on and another to alert me should anyone come too close. That meant wands, of course, which meant I needed my thumbs.

I swear I looked about before I changed. I promise you both I was sure I was completely alone, not a whiff of Peeves or any teachers patrolling. Not even to Padfoot's nose. But no sooner did I change than I heard a tiny gasp from the corridor to the left, just where it turns. I don't know which of us was more startled or more frightened.

No, I do know - I was more startled, but he was more frightened. Our Terry.

Allie, if you could see him. You'd want to catch him up and hold him tight until he just about breaks. Skin and bones, practically, and stunted despite the regular meals he's been getting with Minerva (and I gather he can cadge the house-elves with the best of them). And so scared of what I'd do. I ought to have Obliviated him on the spot - if he'd been a student I certainly would have done - but the moment I realised it had to be Terry, I just couldn't do it.

The moment he realised who I was, he practically fell to the ground and wanted to know what he could do to help. It was more than a little embarrassing, to tell truth - worse than Turner that first time, and that includes him falling overboard trying to hop from Frank's boat to mine. It was just ... Merlin, the boy looked at me with such ... trust. Absolute faith, like my being at Hogwarts meant liberation on the spot.

Once we both recovered our wits, he asked about the transformation. 'Could you teach me to do that? I've been trying on my own but I can't seem to get anywhere.'

Well. In for a Sickle, in for a Galleon, right? 'Only if you promise not to tell anyone,' I heard myself saying. 'Not just that I'm alive and here at Hogwarts, either. The Ministry don't know I'm an Animagus - no one can know that, do you understand?'

He fell to his knees again, swearing all sorts of loyalty and repeating that he'd do anything to help the fabled Sirius Black.

Merlin. I hope I never get used to people treating me like a messiah.

Anyway, we met again last night and after that exchange he had with Carrow I decided just helping him with a transformation isn't enough. I mean to say, I think he could do it eventually, he's got a good deal of innate talent, but it'll take him a while yet. He needs better defences and more quickly than that. I ... I told him to bring his wand next time.

I know, I shouldn't have let on that I know he has a wand. He put it together immediately, much more quickly than I would have guessed, that I must have had a hand in getting the wands for him and others like him. (MORE grovelling, which I could only get him to stop by putting him back on to showing me what he can do with the blessed thing.) He and Hermione have been working - and I think, Allie, with your Neville. At least, he seems quite friendly with your boy, from some of the questions he was asking. He's got some strong instincts for shielding and blocking spells. I think he'll need significant work at offence, as he's really rather timid about taking the initiative. And no wonder, with monsters like Carrow kicking him about his whole life.

We plan to meet about every other night. More than that and I fear he'll drop from exhaustion. But meanwhile, I wanted you two, especially, to know that I'm in contact with him, and looking out for him along with Harry and Hermione.

Better get myself hidden before the students start tromping about.

Oh - Hermione knows and I've confirmed with him that he can talk to her about it, though I haven't said that she has anything to do with us. He'll probably work that out on his own, as well. Fiendish clever, he is, did I mention?